Str8 men rule

Added: Keithan Pier - Date: 14.02.2022 14:29 - Views: 35744 - Clicks: 7660

The social justice issues being addressed in our world at this turbulent time are mammoth, reflecting long-standing structural and systemic racism. Privileged straight white males have been guardians of such systems, purveyors of it, whether intentionally or unintentionally, and have benefited from it, including myself.

What follows is lengthy and detailed, so much so that I am posting it into parts. Str8 men rule rules posting Part 2 require considerable context Part 1which contributes to the length. What have you learned? What has worked? And when you figure Str8 men rule how to get through to white boys, would you share your findings with the rest of us who are TIRED of banging our head against a crooked wall?

I speak about this transition as an old straight white male who has resisted it, experienced it, and is still working on it, personally and societally. New rules but not my rules. The rules for privileged straight white males are not my rules. Many of you reading this have contributed to them. For evaluators but not limited to evaluators. The rules as reported here are not limited to straight white male evaluators though the examples and explanations I will offer will reflect my evaluation experiences and thinking, and my encounters with other straight white male evaluators, including postings to EvalTalk.

Rules focus on behavior. Time is of the essence. Transformation is urgent. Education, dialogue, discussion, and deepening understanding are all Str8 men rule and desirable processes and outcomes, but the bottom line is changed behavior and systems change. After decades of trying to educate men about sexual harassment, the movement has come to focus on enforcing behavioral rules.

The transition from Straight White Males RULE to rules for straight white males has to be, at least in part, about rules: what the new rules are, who makes them, and how they are enforced. Rules will get the attention of straight white males because they know about rules in their role, formal or informal, known or unknown, as rulers, and have enjoyed a world where rules are for others not them. They will therefore take umbrage at being presented with new rules that are about them and that will at least get their attention, which, as those who engage with straight white males know, is a large part of the battle.

Rules not principles. I have spent a great deal of time in the last decade thinking about, distinguishing, and writing about rules versus principles. The first half of the book I did on Principles-Focused Evaluations is about the difference between rules and principles. Rules, as noted above, are simple and behavioral. A STOP means stop. No judgment is involved. No interpretation is necessary. STOP means stop. In sexual interactions NO means NO. Principles require judgment, contextual adaptation, interpretation, and thinking. Defensive driving is a principle. In sexual interactions, mutual consent is a principle.

Because many appear to have difficulty interpreting and applying this principle, institutions, like universities, have had to convert the principle to a rule that where power and status imbalances exist, mutual consent is not possible and is therefore not a defense when allegations of harassment arise. One can hope that social justice and equity transformations usher in a principles-focused world based on mutual respect, valuing diversity, meaningful inclusion, shared power, and authentic equity for all — but in the interim, straight white males cannot be trusted to understand and appropriately interpret principles, so they need the concrete and unambiguous guidance provided by rules.

Assertive, even aggressive, tone and style. Remember this is an encounter between and among straight white males, especially, perhaps mostly, Western-culture straight white males. That is not a culture of subtlety, nuance, or sensitivity. It is a culture of aggression, assertiveness, domination, winning, and control see any action movie or video game for confirmation. The formulation and aggressive tone of the rules reflect that culture.

They will be off-putting to those who, appropriately, abhor that culture. Stating the rules in those cultural terms makes them less ambiguous and more attention-grabbing. Standing Rock Inspiration. One of the most notable is the set of rules formulated by Native American leaders who organized the Standing Rock protest against the oil pipeline.

The Standing Rock Sioux and the Oceti Sakowin leaders had to deal with substantial s of white supporters coming to the protest. They established rules for those supporters and created a training orientation to explain the rules. Adapted versions of some of these will be recognizable in some of the rules for straight white males.

The diplomatic public version of the Standing Rock rules can be found here. Two examples as told to me:. Personal experience informing the rules. Rules are inherently over-generalizations. We evaluators are trained to avoid, detect, and detest over-generalizations. Forget about it. Overgeneralization comes with the territory of rules. Nuances Str8 men rule variations in application come with principles. Rules, in contrast, are universal for those targeted. Indeed, let me offer just such an overgeneralization as part of this context: most straight white males will see themselves as worthy exceptions to these rules because, as individuals, they know themselves to be different.

That sense of individuality, exceptionalism, and entitlement is the very reason that the rules must be stated as universal. One of the rules is that there are no exceptions to the rules. That applies to me as well. Facilitation rules. Rita and I, with many others, share an interest in facilitating evaluation. These rules for straight white males, in contrast, are not a matter for co-creation.

They are, as you will see, to be presented as firm, absolute, and not up for discussion. They may or may not be understood, but they are to be Str8 men rule with. An incomplete list. The list is incomplete, a starting set kindergarten levelfar from exhaustive. Others may want to add their own rules. Bring them on. I noted above that in interacting with female colleagues and colleagues of color about what needs to be done to support a more just and equitable world, I have regularly been advised, indeed urged and instructed, that the greatest help I can offer is to take on other straight white males.

Many are reiterating this point at this time. Those calls for engagement, including on the EvalTalk listserv, are part of the context for the rules that follow in Part 2. PART 2: Ten rules for engaging with systemic racism for straight white males. How to begin? You are in conversation with a straight white male who is showing himself to be largely clueless.

You used to be allowed to smoke anywhere, even college classrooms. Now smoking is prohibited in public buildings. Most organizations have adopted that inclusive grammatical rule for all correspondence Str8 men rule reports. And, let me ask, do you want to know them? I ask because, right now, you can still claim ignorance. Some such scenario sets the stage to introduce the new rules for privileged straight white males. Do not make general authoritative statements about the state of the world, or any parts of it like evaluation.

You do this not to alert others that you are expressing a personal opinion but to remind yourself of that fact because, straight white males often confuse their opinions about the world with how the world actually is because, in their arrogance, self-assurance, and cluelessness, they actually believe they speak truth and that others ought to feel privileged to hear their truth. So, it can be helpful to remind yourself that you are expressing an opinion not speaking truth by prefacing your opinions conditionally. Others already know that anything and everything you say is conditioned by your being a privileged straight white male.

You do. Moreover, the sub-rule of this rule, is never add IMHO. By invoking that particular conditional, you are communicating not humility, but the exact opposite. Privileged straight white males, which is all straight white males in a society that inherently privileges straight white maleness, understandably feel uncomfortable with having their privilege named and exposed. Instead of resisting the privileged status, put your energy into thinking about and identifying the nature of your privilege. A simple example. My sisters were required to do housework without pay because as housewives they would not be paid, so they should not come to expect to be paid for housework.

I was exempt from housework. I was allowed to deliver newspapers to make money. My sisters were denied such opportunities. In elementary school the black students regularly got detention for talking to each other in class, but the white students never did. Several detentions led to suspension; suspension led to failing a grade; being held back a grade and then another, led to dropping out of school; and onward into poverty and prison. Understand your privileges. Search and you will find them, aplenty. Avoid adding contingencies, explanations, conditionals, and limitations to your straight white male identity and corresponding privilege.

What does that mean? Full stop. Your conditionals will simply reveal your cluelessness. That would require adherence to rule two. But omitting the conditionals would at least keep you from overtly exposing your cluelessness.

Str8 men rule

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